The Day My Life was Forever Changed

     

                                       

  I woke up and drove to work like any other morning. However, when I arrived the smell of chicken cooking made instantly nauseous and scramble to the bathroom. Since when did that make someone sick to their stomach? Wait, wait, wait. That was out of the ordinary. I already was late, and had thought it was due to my new anxiety medicine. That was one of the side effects. 

      I asked my coworker to buy a pregnancy test for me. The quickest 5 seconds of my life were after peeling on the stick those two lines showed up instantly. Dumbfounded, and overwhelmed by shock I slumped to the floor. I didn't cry. I didn't feel angry. I mean obviously wasn't like instantly excited here. I was wondering what in the world was I going to do. Well, now I was wondering what in the world were we going to do. 

      My coworker walked in "Are you okay honey? What did it say?" she asked.

I sat up exhaled, and said "yeah we will be okay." She hugged me and said she would help ,me anyway she could. 

     We bought a second test. Positive

     Another friend brought me a third test. Positive.

     I mean at this point we were positive, that it was positive. 

     That night I sat in the father's car. He cried. He had a girlfriend. He was worried about her. What would he say? What would she say? 

     He suggested an abortion. I explained, I didn't believe in abortions for myself. That I would never judge anyone else who had to make a tough decision. However, that wasn't even an option to me. He said the thing I've heard before about how it's not a baby yet. I understood he was just scared. He was younger than me even. It's not like this was my first choice, knocked up at 19. 

   The next day I told my ex. He wanted to be there for me, strangely. God knew exactly what he was doing, when he did this. He later would connect me to someone who would know her potential parents. This moment however, I was raising this baby however I had to. God put a good support system in my life for the road I was about to travel down, was going to be a long bumpy one.

   I was going to be a mommy. This wasn't going to be easy. I knew that. But it was going to be alright. Suddenly, I had a reason to be a better person. I had a reason to quit smoking.

I had a reason to better myself. I had a reason to get up out of bed when I didn't want to move.

God knew what he was doing in my life.